Wait, wouldn't a perfect shift actually mean nobody showed up because they were all sick?

Man, that half-hitch trick is a lifesaver. I had a similar headache with a 10-foot I-beam at a job in Charlotte. Tried everything, load kept spinning like a top. Finally threw a half-hitch on the line right above the hook and it settled down in one swing. Another one that's saved me is using a simple cow hitch on a load with a bent eye. Works like a charm when you don't have a shackle handy.

Honestly I used to think tool offset mistakes were just something beginners did and then you moved past it. But after hearing you describe that specific Brother S700 thing it kind of made me realize how easy it is to get stuck in a wrong way of thinking even when you know better. I mean the whole add vs subtract thing can get really confusing when you're used to a different control or just have a brain fog day. Idk maybe it's just me but I've definitely had moments where I thought I had a method down and then found out I was doing it totally backwards. It's good that you finally caught it though, that 0.015" oversize has to feel frustrating to look back on.