Saw my buddy fight with two oak boards from the same tree. The end grain on one drank the stain like water, but the other side stayed almost clean. He finally realized the wood's cut changes how it soaks up color completely.
Actually that grain direction thing gets WAY overblown. Most times it's not the cut but if the wood was dried right or how dense that specific board grew. I've seen boards from different cuts take stain the same when you prep them right with a good sealer first.